I'm on a wait and see phase with mu character crisis and feeling debressed. Thats better than what I was while I had panic over my characters.


Maybe I should try to draw a picture of Voldo---I somehow know that its going to fail,but I still want try. I fail in Soul Calibur fan art.

I really am! DDD8>

Okey *deep breath* I shall start from the beginning. Several days ago at night,I had just finished a character and I was really proud of the way he looked. But after that I suddently felt debressed,because no matter how good the desing is,I'm never going to draw that character after this. The thought really made me debressed... I know that I have made several very good character desings(I'm such a stubid narsist T.T),ones that actually look the way I imagined them to look,but theres no point in making characters that you dont even remember afterwards. After that I was few days as happy as I could be and got back to DA.
Here,I talked to a fellow deviant who told me that her characters,that she still love and care about,have been around 5 years. The thought got back to me. I felt and still feel pathetic because of it. I could never have that deeb pond with my characters,no matter how good they were. I told her about my problem to abandon my characters and she told me that she had done the same thing many times before this. Now I dont feel as alone with this problem,but I still feel a bit lonely.

And now to this day. I was wisiting 's site since I really love her drawings.
Her characters look and are unique,they almost seem to live their own life. Now the different version of the thought came up. "Why my characters arent as lively as 's characters?" The result of my thinking was:"Because I dont give them life and I abandom them right away."

Now I'm over the top debressed. I dont know what should I do with this problem.
Please help me (Stubid idiotic imbesile) out! D8>

(and p.s: I'm really really really sorry for what I did to you Buumna and if it helps you even a little,I really dont want to show my face to you right now. Not tomorrow at least.
Thats how shamed I am.)

Yeah,I'm getting better That also means I'm going to school tomorrow |B(

But anyway,I'm trying my best not have such a long break again this year.

I got a shot for swine flu yesterday and boy,aint I feeling good DX< My stomach has hated me enough for several weeks but now I coudnt almost sleep because of it! And the fewer,agh,talk about the FEWER. I certainly didnt sleep well last night,actually I was still awake when my sister woke up to go to work (and thats 05:45 in the morning!) Now that I have ranted about how sick I feel,I shall move on

I'm sorry,but I havent been able to regain my interest for DA yeat. I'm quite sure that it will come back at some point,but in the mean time I will just play Teken and Soul Calibur
I bought Soulcalibur 3 and 2 and right now I have Tekken 3 and 5. I'm SO going to buy Tekken tag tournament,that game rocks! But anyway,I'm really sorry....

..But I have come to a conclusion that it would be better if I take some time off from DA. Yes I know,I have done it something about 3 times this year....